Direction

Today marks the end of my summer in Italy. It’s my last full day here before leaving for the airport bright and early tomorrow morning. I’m sitting on the rooftop of my hotel in Venice, listening to the Sunday morning bells ring out across the city under cloudy skies. We arrived here Friday, and I must say, Venice is absolutely breathtaking. This seems like the perfect place to wrap up my time here on the program.

I initially embarked on this study abroad with the idea that I’d completely devote myself to my art and “find my hand” so-to-speak. Things turned out a little differently to say the least, and if pressed to sum up my discoveries from this experience, I’d have to say that this summer has given a chance to think a lot about direction. Where I’m going, what I’m doing, who I want to be with, that sort of thing.

My favorite experience by far has been my jewelry course this summer. I feel rather guilty for concentrating so much on it and less on graphic design, but I absolutely couldn’t help the obsession. I spent most of my time down in the metals studio, and there was definitely more than one dinner I skipped to enjoy the empty space available to me and work straight through the evening into the early morning hours. I love working in metal, I love working in wax and casting, I love it all, and I feel immensely creative doing it. Mary has been gently hinting that I should take many more classes once I get back to Athens… She really thinks I’d do well in jewelry and that I would be doing myself a disservice if I didn’t explore this further. I guess it kind of hit me while we were visiting Alchimia, a contemporary jewelry school in Florence… Just walking around the studios. It was like I could physically see the creative energy clinging to the place. Is it possible for a place to have creativity “flocking?”

As much as I’d like to, I don’t know if I can take more jewelry classes at the moment. I LOVE it. I really do. It’s just that my schedule is a little jam packed at the moment. Oh, what I wouldn’t give to be able to enroll in Alchimia and spend a few years in Europe, developing art jewelry! (sigh) I guess the money’s just not there right now, and neither is the time. Okay. That doesn’t mean I can’t ever come back to it… There are always short summer groups like Penland that I can go to later on to learn more, and with the work I did this summer I might even be able to get a scholarship. And then there’s always grad school. Who knows. Plus, Mary said that she started up her studio for just around a few thousand dollars, so it’s not a lost cause for a crazy hobby/obsession/calling, right?

It’s like there’s a physical ache inside of me that’s just yearning, needing to create artistic things. Graphic design is a great fit in terms of having an obsession pay the bills… I just hope I can make it work for me. I’ve got a game plan going, entering my final year in school: I want to get out of school and work with a small graphic design group that gives me a ton of challenges and helps me grow. I want to work directly with art directors and clients and as many people in the process as I can so I can learn as much as possible. I don’t know where I’m going to find this or where it’s going to take me… I just know that I have to be open to going anywhere to get it.


Jim Cotter, one of Mary’s jeweler friends, has been traveling with us for the later part of the trip. I think he has found the best way of describing my concept of my happy map, and I’ll try my best to do justice to the way he put it:

“Approach what you do like a heroin addict. You should be so obsessed with what you do that you’re constantly worrying about it – worried about if you get your fix before lunchtime, worried about getting more by dinner, and obsessing over it as you go to bed.” – J. Cotter (or something like that)

I like that approach. A lot. It fits very neatly with my current happy map theory, but highlights the more frantic and avid nature of my pursuit of passion.

This summer has also given me a chance to look at my relationship from a distance (literally). Adam and I have discovered quite a bit, and the time apart has given us perspective… It’s not like we didn’t realize we had something good going. We just got a chance to really see it highlighted. I never doubted us for a moment, and this summer just goes to show that we’re moving towards some pretty exciting times ahead of us, which is one reason I cannot WAIT to get home.

As for traveling, I’m hooked. Italy is beautiful, but I’m not too interested in seeing traditional touristy European sites. And I never – I repeat, NEVER – want to travel in a large group again. I hate the drone mentality and the association of being in a herd, and being on someone else’s schedule rushed from place to place. It was nice being able to see everything, and it was also nice being able to compare to what I don’t want to do in the future. I know that I want to visit art museums everywhere I go and see as much art as possible in every city: museums, architecture, music, street art, graffiti, you name it. It’s all so inspiring. My favorite parts have been the actual getting places (especially going on side trips alone, like seeing Dave Matthews Band in Luca one weekend). Navigating airports, train stations and bus lines, and finding my way alone has been an absolute blast, and I have a lot of confidence in my travel competency now because of it. I also know that I don’t want to travel alone; I’ve found my life travel partner in Adam, and can’t wait to explore with him. Too many things to see! I know these dreams of travel cost a lot of money… but it doesn’t all have to be expensive. And if there’s a desire, there’s got to be a way to get at it. I’ll make it work.

So direction. Yeah. Not really sure where I’m going yet, but I’ve got a good idea on how I want to approach this artistic aching inside of me. I look at the faculty here, their success, and I wonder how the hell someone gets from here (student) to there (actually living off what they love, and not only teaching). Best answer I’ve gotten from one of them? “You make your own luck.” I can do that. It’ll take a lot of effort and a lot of energy – positive, creative, and literal. So I’ll get some sleep, pull out that happy map, and “shoot up” on inspiration before setting out. Let’s see what happens!